Hey wonderful people,
I just finished reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho... if you haven't read it then I really recommend it... it's such a beautiful book!
I'm telling you this because I came across a bit of it that I really loved as a quote and want to share it with you....
"Before a dream is realised, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realising our dreams, master the lessons we've learned as we've moved toward that dream. That's the point at which most people give up. It's the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on the horizon."
We can look at this from a recovery perspective... After months/years/decades of our journey to recovery (the dream) things can seem to suddenly become difficult again (such as a relapse or a very difficult/emotional situation that has the potential to cause a relapse). The world is not trying to be evil and put us through even more pain but it is putting everything you have learnt in your recovery journey to the test. It may seem easy to give up and allow the eating disorder to take over once again. But if you hold on that little bit longer you will get through to the other side where you are able to reach your dream knowing from your test that you have learnt the skills along the way needed to keep you there.
Hope you're all ok
p.s. since my last blog..... I'm doing great... food NOT an issue :)
Love Jasmin
Showing posts with label Quotes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Quotes. Show all posts
Tuesday, 3 April 2012
Monday, 21 February 2011
Eating Disorder Awareness Week...
Heyyy everyone...
So, today is the start of eating disorder awareness week and luckily half term for me (yay!) so I will try to write a new post everyday this week.
I just wanted to tell you all about New Looks new Beat watches. As you know I am a Beat young ambassador and this Saturday I went to New Look with some other people from Beat to kind of launch the watches and have some photos taken to start promoting them. They are £2 and the money goes towards Beat so if you haven't already...go and buy one!
I have lots of things planned for my blog this week including a guest blog but for today I'd just like to share a recovery analogy with you from the book 'The Rules of Normal Eating'....
Why is change so slow?
"Picture a hill of damp sand with a marble on top. If you give the marble a nudge in one direction, it will roll down the hill, forming a slight groove in the sand. Each time the marble gets nudged in the same direction, it will slide into the groove, and plunge downward.
Now suppose you decide that you want the marble to roll down the other side of the sand hill. You'll have to place the marble on top of the hill and push it in the other direction because if you don't, it will slip automatically into its old groove. If you push it only once or twice in the new direction, its inclination will still be to return to return to its old groove. So initially, you'll need to push the marble in the new direction over and over until a new groove is carved out. Eventually when your old groove and the new groove are about even, the marble will have the potential to roll either way. To ensure that it will always go in the new direction, you'll have to keep gently nudging it until the old groove fills up with sand and the new groove is deeply carved. Then the marble will naturally fall into the new groove every time.
Translating this marble analogy into behavioral terms, we have to repeat a new behavior more often than an old behavior in order to have the new one become a habit and the old one disappear. Behaviorists call this process conditioning because it conditions or prompts us to behave in certain ways. Of course most people are not linear learners and don't go straight from point A to point B. We try a new way, revert back to the old way for a while, then tentatively try the new way again. We're inconsistent, then we wonder why we're not changing quickly enough, after all our hard work.
Think back to the marble on the sand hill. What would happen if sometimes you pushed it one way and sometimes you pushed it the other? The old and new grooves would stay about even right? That's what happens when you try a new behavior or way of thinking, then return to the old action or thought. For example, if food makes you anxious, you try pushing yourself to eat when you're moderately hungry. Succeeding you feel proud of overcoming your fear. But the next time you feel hunger pangs, you ignore them and put off eating until you are nearly sick. Or you triumphantly pass by the jar of chocolate kisses on your worker's desk one day, only to find yourself sneaking a handful the next. Alternating like this for days, weeks, months, or even years causes you to feel as if you never change even though you're doing things right a good deal of the time. You prevent yourself from changing by reinforcing both the new and the old, achieving a behavioral draw.
Returning to the marble analogy, we could say that every time you revert to an old behavior, you're deepening the first groove,while every time you push yourself to practice a new behavior, you're not only carving the second groove more deeply, but you're allowing sand to erase the first one. Similarly, if you continue to press onward with a new behavior, the neural pathway in your brain that elicited the old behavior will eventually fade away."
Hope you're all ok
Love Jasmin
So, today is the start of eating disorder awareness week and luckily half term for me (yay!) so I will try to write a new post everyday this week.
I just wanted to tell you all about New Looks new Beat watches. As you know I am a Beat young ambassador and this Saturday I went to New Look with some other people from Beat to kind of launch the watches and have some photos taken to start promoting them. They are £2 and the money goes towards Beat so if you haven't already...go and buy one!
I have lots of things planned for my blog this week including a guest blog but for today I'd just like to share a recovery analogy with you from the book 'The Rules of Normal Eating'....
Why is change so slow?
"Picture a hill of damp sand with a marble on top. If you give the marble a nudge in one direction, it will roll down the hill, forming a slight groove in the sand. Each time the marble gets nudged in the same direction, it will slide into the groove, and plunge downward.
Now suppose you decide that you want the marble to roll down the other side of the sand hill. You'll have to place the marble on top of the hill and push it in the other direction because if you don't, it will slip automatically into its old groove. If you push it only once or twice in the new direction, its inclination will still be to return to return to its old groove. So initially, you'll need to push the marble in the new direction over and over until a new groove is carved out. Eventually when your old groove and the new groove are about even, the marble will have the potential to roll either way. To ensure that it will always go in the new direction, you'll have to keep gently nudging it until the old groove fills up with sand and the new groove is deeply carved. Then the marble will naturally fall into the new groove every time.
Translating this marble analogy into behavioral terms, we have to repeat a new behavior more often than an old behavior in order to have the new one become a habit and the old one disappear. Behaviorists call this process conditioning because it conditions or prompts us to behave in certain ways. Of course most people are not linear learners and don't go straight from point A to point B. We try a new way, revert back to the old way for a while, then tentatively try the new way again. We're inconsistent, then we wonder why we're not changing quickly enough, after all our hard work.
Think back to the marble on the sand hill. What would happen if sometimes you pushed it one way and sometimes you pushed it the other? The old and new grooves would stay about even right? That's what happens when you try a new behavior or way of thinking, then return to the old action or thought. For example, if food makes you anxious, you try pushing yourself to eat when you're moderately hungry. Succeeding you feel proud of overcoming your fear. But the next time you feel hunger pangs, you ignore them and put off eating until you are nearly sick. Or you triumphantly pass by the jar of chocolate kisses on your worker's desk one day, only to find yourself sneaking a handful the next. Alternating like this for days, weeks, months, or even years causes you to feel as if you never change even though you're doing things right a good deal of the time. You prevent yourself from changing by reinforcing both the new and the old, achieving a behavioral draw.
Returning to the marble analogy, we could say that every time you revert to an old behavior, you're deepening the first groove,while every time you push yourself to practice a new behavior, you're not only carving the second groove more deeply, but you're allowing sand to erase the first one. Similarly, if you continue to press onward with a new behavior, the neural pathway in your brain that elicited the old behavior will eventually fade away."
Hope you're all ok
Love Jasmin
Tuesday, 1 February 2011
Another... Recovery quote!
I do love recovery quotes...(in case you hadn't noticed). I always found they were able to give me hope or a bigger feeling of courage when I was feeling low.
I just came across this one in my recovery flash cards which I have a massive pile of and I think it's a really good way of looking at the recovery process...
"Very slowly and carefully, you let go of the log and practise floating. When you start to sink you grab back on. Then you let go of the log and practise treading water, and when you get tired, hold on once again. After a while, you practise swimming around the log, twice, ten times, twenty times, a hundred times, until you gain the strength and confidence you need to swim to shore. Only then do you completely let go of the log."
Hope you're all ok
Love Jasmin
I just came across this one in my recovery flash cards which I have a massive pile of and I think it's a really good way of looking at the recovery process...
"Very slowly and carefully, you let go of the log and practise floating. When you start to sink you grab back on. Then you let go of the log and practise treading water, and when you get tired, hold on once again. After a while, you practise swimming around the log, twice, ten times, twenty times, a hundred times, until you gain the strength and confidence you need to swim to shore. Only then do you completely let go of the log."
Hope you're all ok
Love Jasmin
Tuesday, 28 December 2010
"The morning sun is shining just for you"
"Difficulties arise in the lives of us all. What is most important is dealing with the hard times, coping with the changes, and getting through to the other side where the sun is still shining just for you...
It takes a strong person to deal with tough times and difficult choices. But you are a strong person.
It takes courage. But you possess the inner courage to see you through.
It takes being an active participant in your life. But you are in the driver's seat, and you can determine the direction you want tomorrow to go in...
Try not to lose sight of the one thing that is constant, beautiful and true:
Everything will be fine - and it will turn out that way because of the special kind of person you are.
So...beginning today and lasting a life time through - hang in there, and don't be afraid to feel like the morning sun is shining...just for you." (Douglas Pagels)
It takes a strong person to deal with tough times and difficult choices. But you are a strong person.
It takes courage. But you possess the inner courage to see you through.
It takes being an active participant in your life. But you are in the driver's seat, and you can determine the direction you want tomorrow to go in...
Try not to lose sight of the one thing that is constant, beautiful and true:
Everything will be fine - and it will turn out that way because of the special kind of person you are.
So...beginning today and lasting a life time through - hang in there, and don't be afraid to feel like the morning sun is shining...just for you." (Douglas Pagels)
Tuesday, 30 November 2010
The Rules of "Normal" Eating
I have mentioned that I am currently reading the above book by Karen R. Koenig, although slowly as I am super busy with assessments coming up! But I thought I'd share with you what she says the rules of "normal" eating actually are.
She says that "normal" eaters:
1. Eat when they are hungry or have a craving
2. Choose foods they believe will satisfy them
3. Stay connected to their bodies and eat with awareness and enjoyment
4. Stop eating when they are full or satisfied
It's good to know what we are aiming for! Of course normal eating is different for everyone but this is the general idea.
Love Jasmin x
She says that "normal" eaters:
1. Eat when they are hungry or have a craving
2. Choose foods they believe will satisfy them
3. Stay connected to their bodies and eat with awareness and enjoyment
4. Stop eating when they are full or satisfied
It's good to know what we are aiming for! Of course normal eating is different for everyone but this is the general idea.
Love Jasmin x
Monday, 29 November 2010
My Carb challenge...the results!
Ok, so I've been trying to have some form of complex carbs everyday for a few weeks now and the good news is that it has helped with my weight a lot. It's pretty much stayed the same and stopped fluctuating so drastically which is good and proves my theory about complex carbs and my weight. I now feel safer about eating carbs and have found that I do actually enjoy them sometimes so there's no reason to avoid them in the future.
Moving on, I have a new quote for you that I found in a book called 'The Power of Concentration' by Theron Q. Dumont:
"You alone can decide when the turning point will come. It is a matter of choice whether we allow our diviner self to control us or whether we will be controlled by the brute within us. No man has to do anything he does not want to do. He is therefore the director of his life if he wills to be."
The book is about gaining success through concentration but I thought it was a good recovery quote.
Love Jasmin x
Moving on, I have a new quote for you that I found in a book called 'The Power of Concentration' by Theron Q. Dumont:
"You alone can decide when the turning point will come. It is a matter of choice whether we allow our diviner self to control us or whether we will be controlled by the brute within us. No man has to do anything he does not want to do. He is therefore the director of his life if he wills to be."
The book is about gaining success through concentration but I thought it was a good recovery quote.
Love Jasmin x
Sunday, 7 November 2010
The Rules of "Normal Eating"
The Rules of "Normal Eating" is a book written by Karen R.Koenig. I bought it yesterday and already love it.
We go into recovery hoping to come out the other end with somewhat "normal" eating habits. At least that's what I wanted. But what is "normal"? Normal is different for everyone but here are some of the rules in the book. Normal eaters:
- Eat when they are hungry or have a craving
- Choose foods they believe will satisfy them
- Stay connected to their bodies and eat with awareness and enjoyment
- Stop eating when they are full or satisfied
Something she wrote which I particularly liked is the following:
"I think of myself as a "normal" eater about 90-95 percent of the time. Because of my dysfunctional relationship with food for three-plus decade, I accept that I might never eat like someone who never had an eating problem. And that's fine with me. I'm like a person who has learned a second language and speaks it fluently but with a slight accent, or someone who has been injured and walks with a barely perceptable limp. I don't expect to be perfect."
I believe that full recovery is possible. However I don't think this means your relationship with food has to be perfect. It is important to expect this and don't beat yourself up for any residual habits or thoughts you might have after recovery.
Hope you're all ok.
Jasmin x
We go into recovery hoping to come out the other end with somewhat "normal" eating habits. At least that's what I wanted. But what is "normal"? Normal is different for everyone but here are some of the rules in the book. Normal eaters:
- Eat when they are hungry or have a craving
- Choose foods they believe will satisfy them
- Stay connected to their bodies and eat with awareness and enjoyment
- Stop eating when they are full or satisfied
Something she wrote which I particularly liked is the following:
"I think of myself as a "normal" eater about 90-95 percent of the time. Because of my dysfunctional relationship with food for three-plus decade, I accept that I might never eat like someone who never had an eating problem. And that's fine with me. I'm like a person who has learned a second language and speaks it fluently but with a slight accent, or someone who has been injured and walks with a barely perceptable limp. I don't expect to be perfect."
I believe that full recovery is possible. However I don't think this means your relationship with food has to be perfect. It is important to expect this and don't beat yourself up for any residual habits or thoughts you might have after recovery.
Hope you're all ok.
Jasmin x
Thursday, 30 September 2010
6 ways to keep smiling...
I just came across a card from my teacher that she gave me years ago with the following message...
6 ways to keep smiling:
Hold on to your dreams and never let them go.
Show the world how wonderful you are.
Look on the bright side and don't let adversity keep you from winning.
Be yourself because you are filled with many special qualities.
Keep your spirits up.
Make your heart happy, and let it reflect on everything you do.
Love Jasmin
6 ways to keep smiling:
Hold on to your dreams and never let them go.
Show the world how wonderful you are.
Look on the bright side and don't let adversity keep you from winning.
Be yourself because you are filled with many special qualities.
Keep your spirits up.
Make your heart happy, and let it reflect on everything you do.
Love Jasmin
Tuesday, 21 September 2010
Let's build a current...
"Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centres of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance." (Robert Kennedy - 1966)
Together we can not only beat eating disorders but the stigma attached to them by the media. We can change the world's view on them and those suffering will no longer need to feel alienated and scared because the world will be on our side and the battle can be approached not with uncertainty and reservation but with the pride and strength needed to win against this disease.
Keep fighting xxxx
Together we can not only beat eating disorders but the stigma attached to them by the media. We can change the world's view on them and those suffering will no longer need to feel alienated and scared because the world will be on our side and the battle can be approached not with uncertainty and reservation but with the pride and strength needed to win against this disease.
Keep fighting xxxx
Sunday, 12 September 2010
Make your life what you want it to be
I have just been watching a video on a recovery blog and I really liked something she said...
"Recovered to me means that you are living the way you want to live and it doesn’t take an extreme amount of effort to do so."
Right now I feel like my life has got to a point where at this moment in time I am living the way I want to live. I love my uni, my job, my friends, I have become a lot more independent, now I have a job I have a bit more money to be able to spend some on myself, I have just moved into a great new flat in an area I love, family life isn't too bad, I'm not depressed anymore, eating is going well, and as much as my body isn't exactly how I want it, I can live with it without hating myself.
If your life isn't how you want it, ask yourself how you want it to be? What do you need in your life right now and what would make you happy. Of course we'd all like to be millionaires or be famous but think realistically about how your life could be if you took the right steps forward.
After answering this think about how you could achieve some of those things. If you would like a job, start looking. If you would like new friends go out and meet people. If you would like to do something new but don't have the qualifications do a course in whatever it is you think will make you happier.
I believe that if you start to focus on improving other areas of your life and make it the way you want it then recovery will become easier. You will be happier which will cause you to depend less on your eating disorder to give you control. Start to take control of your life in other ways.
You might be thinking that this is easier said than done and how can you make your life the way you want it to be? Start thinking positively. A few months ago my life was no where near where I wanted it to be. But I decided to change how I thought. I started to do different exercises and read books to improve positive thinking. Since then my life has somehow, miraculously improved in so many areas. I will do a post soon on positive thinking to help you with this.
Don't wait for further recovery to start making your life the way you want it. Start doing it now and recovery will follow.
Hope everyone is well, stay strong.
Love Jasmin xxx
"Recovered to me means that you are living the way you want to live and it doesn’t take an extreme amount of effort to do so."
Right now I feel like my life has got to a point where at this moment in time I am living the way I want to live. I love my uni, my job, my friends, I have become a lot more independent, now I have a job I have a bit more money to be able to spend some on myself, I have just moved into a great new flat in an area I love, family life isn't too bad, I'm not depressed anymore, eating is going well, and as much as my body isn't exactly how I want it, I can live with it without hating myself.
If your life isn't how you want it, ask yourself how you want it to be? What do you need in your life right now and what would make you happy. Of course we'd all like to be millionaires or be famous but think realistically about how your life could be if you took the right steps forward.
After answering this think about how you could achieve some of those things. If you would like a job, start looking. If you would like new friends go out and meet people. If you would like to do something new but don't have the qualifications do a course in whatever it is you think will make you happier.
I believe that if you start to focus on improving other areas of your life and make it the way you want it then recovery will become easier. You will be happier which will cause you to depend less on your eating disorder to give you control. Start to take control of your life in other ways.
You might be thinking that this is easier said than done and how can you make your life the way you want it to be? Start thinking positively. A few months ago my life was no where near where I wanted it to be. But I decided to change how I thought. I started to do different exercises and read books to improve positive thinking. Since then my life has somehow, miraculously improved in so many areas. I will do a post soon on positive thinking to help you with this.
Don't wait for further recovery to start making your life the way you want it. Start doing it now and recovery will follow.
Hope everyone is well, stay strong.
Love Jasmin xxx
Thursday, 9 September 2010
The Serenity Prayer
Just because I like it...
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as he did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that he will make all things right if I surrender to his will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with him forever in the next."
Love Jasmin xxxx
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as he did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that he will make all things right if I surrender to his will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with him forever in the next."
Love Jasmin xxxx
Thursday, 12 August 2010
"This is me damn it!"
The following is a quote by Stacey Charter which I read earlier and liked so I thought I'd share it with you...
"There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me...or leave me. Accept me...or walk away! Do not try to make me like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mould. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision. When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you."
Love Jasmin x
"There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me...or leave me. Accept me...or walk away! Do not try to make me like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mould. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision. When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you."
Love Jasmin x
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